I really like hand sanitizer.

Hand Sanititzer is awesome. It makes you all clean so you don't keel over and DIE!!! Yep. What it does is kill the icky blicky germs on my hands. The secret is Tocopheryl Acetate. I like the tiny .5 fl oz. They fit in me pockets.
Acid
Acid is bad
I chill at my pad
Of cheese and stuff
I don't like stiff cuff(s)
And cheese that is tough
And oddly enough
I don't want Dad to die
Cause then I would want to fly
Over into a cheese factory
With cheese satifactory
I would die it all green
That would make me a mean teen on the scene.
Watch your spleen.
I like speakers
And mixing plutonium in beakers
And police would be seekers
For me.
I like candy canes
The red looks like veins
Which don't taste to good
Bad people have hoods
But my car does too
I like tieing my shoe.
The End

Oh, Whoa, how did you manage it???

This a question that I often ask moms. They like control (literal) 4-34 minds at once while remaining sane... or do they? I often think that moms loose their minds after they have a child. Trust me, I know a couple moms and they're all cool, "Sure you can jump off the bridge." But then after a child, "Don't even think about walking on that cement sidewalk, you might trip and fall and DIE!!!" ARGH, they bug me. But they're still cool cause they are nice. I mean look at my mom... Yeah. I'm finally finishing up this blog about a month later. Ooh, learned a couple stuff that happened on my birthday. Wann hear? Okay. September 19 is...
The day that the "Iceman" mummy was discovered. Spet 19, 1921. It was 5300 years old!
A part of Tolkein Week. September 18-24.
The day that the "Flipper" TV series premeried in 1964.
ER came out on Sept. 19, 1994.
A part of National Love Your Files week. Sept 19-23.
And the last one is one I just discovered 2 years ago...
Talk Like A Pirate Day. It is an awesome day.
Yep. So now you know yay!

Ack! Shoes are bad.

Okay, not literaly for all of you girls that are obsessed (I know a few) but dress shoes bug me. I have to go to Bell Square today, I mean, I GET to go. What an honor? But my dress shoes were to big or small so I'm wearing square dancing shoes. Those are cool cause they have elastic bands. Elastic is so cool. I mean, it can get bigger, then smaller, then bigger, it can CHANGE!!! *you hear an angel choir in the background*. I like the jeans with the elastic on it because they fit me better. Since I was 11 I've had those kind. I get them at GapKids. I like that place too. Although I might be considered a "teen" now, that is not my genre. Not by size at least... unless I want to wear ugly shirts that are too tight. Those things bug me. The ones that say, "Tropical Beachland, WA" and then go on about some random place that doesn't even EXIST!!! That is evil. I like to call it false advertising... which is bad. So those shirts should be banned. ooh, I also don't like it when people are unoriginal. That bugs me. They think, oh, I'm so special but they're NOT!!! There, see how special I am? Cheese is good. I like cheese. Except for processed cheese, that smells funny.

Rooters are Not Made of Cheese!

I guess I should explain to you why I am the Rooster Ruler. That is because I rule the Roosters. The roosters like it when I rule them because they are stupid. Actualy,they are very smart to want that. Because I give the rights like the right to dip their feet in rubber on Thursdays. I decided that I would give them some triple bunk beds. Those are really high except everyone just shares the bottom bunks because they can't get to the top. There are no hens. So this population of Roosterville is dieing out very slowly. Now if I got a dog. I bet that they would all die and I would be foreever unhappy. That makes sense right? Okay, so I also have a cool thing called a Roosterpainter. It's kinda like a car detailing thing except they paint the roosters. It's with a special kind of paint made of peppermint extract and colorful stuff like Blue 3. You know, those weird color names on food lables. It's completely harmless, well as harmless as getting your hairdyed. We only have 10 colors:
Orange
Yellow
Red
Green
Blue
Teal
Black
and White.
Pretty spiffy eh? The roosters have their own little resturant called Soufle Cafe. I consider that a pretty cheesey name. But it has no meat in it. That is the one thing. If they ate meat then that would kinda be like canabilism which is bad. They have lots of tea like peppermint tea. They like minty things, which leads me to their main occupation. Candy cane stripe painting. Yes, that is true. All day, they churn out candy canes and paint the stripes. That's why they're so fat. Because they eat alot of candy. Wanna move here?

A Poem that is Special!!!

I have some ADHD
I got it from coffee and tea
I like to jump up and down
And take the bus to town
Cheesey poems make me happy
I hate adults when they're sappy
How can you read this much more?
I would assume it would be total bore.
Roosters are cool
I wish we still had a pool
Cause then I could go swimming in it and be all happy cause I would be in the water except for it's cold outside and I would get all sick and DIE
Hope someday I can fly
Over the buildings till spalt
The monerail hit me... now I'm flat.
I live in Seattle with rain
But they say no pain no gain.
This is really quite entertain(ing)
And your intrest you are not feigning
Wow am I great or what?
But I jolt when my bike hits a rut.
Why doesn't the president come see me?
It would fill me with such glee.
No honestly.
Yes this is the end.
I hope you have not been offend(ded).

Slimey Soup of Cheese

Every heard of Mrs. Pollifax? Wonderufl series about an old lady who gets a job as a CIA agent. Everything is unexpected and hilarious. Did you know that candy canes are very fun to eat? I love those things. Today was special... I mixed different substances together to make a density colum. Love those things. Did you know that the more dense something is, the lower it will get. If you didn't know that, you are also dense okay? Well anyways, what if you put some plutonium in it... or some ketchup. Where would they be? Perhaps at the bottom... and for the plutonium stuff, you would be in jail. But I am quite positive about everything. The sky is black (cause it's night) and my parents are watching the incredibles. I love that movie. I need to do a blog on that...

Serious Questions Indeed

Your people want to make a statue in your honor. What will it be made out of and what victory will it commemorate?
This statue will be me holding a rooster and it would say:
"To those who trust in the rooster, have found a friend. Roosters are cool."
It will honor the roosters that have died for us to have a meal... or is that chickens. I often get confused about what I am eating. Do you? Sad huh? Well anyways. It would be made of stainless steel and would be in the new Seattle Public Library cause I love that place.

Umm...

This is quite unlclear on what I should be doing on a Blog. What IS a blog. I have. No idea. Oh, here's what I put on Jessie's card:

Miss Maiden Jessica,
Happy Happy Happy… VERY Happy Birthday to you.
For your birthday present, we have donated $16 in your name to Pastor Louis in the Dominican Republic.
-Maggie
Ruler of all Roosters 

PS: You are a special person and that’s good cause if you weren’t special then we would all cry and you wouldn’t be to happy cause we wouldn’t be, but this doesn’t really matter now does it? Actually it does. Our feelings (and yours) are quite important thus… why don’t we all eat some crackers and jalapeno spread. You know what? I don’t like to eat fish that much. They kinda gross me out. And pencil shavings don’t taste good either. I know lots of people though who strangely like to eat them. Odd huh? Actually I don’t but that sounded very odd. Not that I’m not odd. I am quite sane.
Wasn't that fun? Good.